Why do you still think about your ex years later?

This was mind blowing I am going thru this right now

I tried to move on, to get myself in work, excercise, left social media, got into therapy, i know what i did, i know what she did that made the relationship. I couldnt be me with her so why do miss her so damn much when i remember my self worth was at an all time low then? For gods sake she didnt even liked my dogs, and now i have one more who is the love of my life, my son if you will. The reason i havent moved out is them bc if i moved out no one would csre for them. She hates dogs, i love dogs. Im becoming more me but at the same time i miss her so much, i dream of her and getting bsck together more than i am willing to admit, why cant i let her go and go on

I am facing same issues it has been 3 years the person left me,out of nowhere ahe will come to my mind.and i alz going yo the same past again and again.

I am facing same issues it has been 3 years the person left me,out of nowhere ahe will come to my mind.and i alz going yo the same past again and again.

Thanks

@positive spell temple

I really appreciate Dr positive spell temple for bringing my partner back begging me to forgive him

I still have feelings for my ex. We were young at the time.But I never ❤️ they one else like at. At why I still single I think.

I remember the good times but I remember all the hard times and fights and not wanting to come home. 10 years after are divorce and I miss her like crazy and I want her back in my life remembering all the good times and bad and I don’t know why.

man this hit home for me mine situation is a little different im actually married to a woman i truly love for almost 10 yrs but i still think about my ex of 20 years ago, she broke my heart badly, she was my first love and we tried to make it work for awhlie but the long distance didnt help i just started my new job and she was finishing up school, we tried this for 2.5 yrs right after we were over turns out she moved on really really fast like she told me she loved me then 2 weeks later started seeing that dude after we ended things, FTR I broke up with her because i didnt want her to worry about me and focus on school, but instead she met someone during her studies, got engaged and married within a year of us breaking up while stlil in med school, that hit me hard and was the biggest slap in my face , made me think our relationship meant nothing then to me from her to do that so soon, she wasnt cheating as well she promised me, i think deep down i have PTSD from this and havenmt moved on , I miss her so much still and it sucks i cant get over here even bein married to a wonderfull woman, so much stuff i see or hear reminds me of her and my brain goes back to that happy time then it goes downward fast, i guess ive never had complete closure on how it all went down stlil doesnt make sense to me, im stuck illl be fine then all of a sudden i think about her and get sad as hell its a nonstop cycle thanks for this clip it sheds some light

In 'my opinion' the reason we long for our exes or feelings for them is because..
Of 'that taste of love' which we get first time in our life (when were in relationship with them ), it made us addicted to it for a while and then one day it's suddenly stops ( break ups) ..as a result we felt this upside down withdrawals as a side effects.

I think one reason would be : thinking about the bad sides of the ex ( before she became an ex ) as if these are so bad to live with ( brain tries to get someone who's perfect ). Then you find that other person ( after ex became an ex ) has bad sides that are worse than the ex's. This might be why ( thoughts trying to get you thinking the right way and learning to adapt to that's actually easy to live with).

I still think about my 1st ex we were everything

i am in total trap. i am not able to let go bcs of the kids we have. and we still have to cooperate and i still have to know what she is doing ... 6 years after divorce she moved on with another guy. i am still not able to move on with other women bcs of my red pill waware ess about the plantation and female nature.
i thought i got over it. but this situation has stirred things up big time. i feel stuck. and bcs of the kids i can not see the way out. its is torture to see her eing happy and have another guy at home with my kids. i am dying... what can i do to let this go?

How can i deal with it ?? How can i heal from this?

It's been 6 years since we broke up.
And we have a son.
I've had a whole other relationship (4 years long) come and go, yet I still miss her.
Recently we had a one night stand. 1 month prior to me typing this .
We talked, caught up, then "did it".

It was amazing. However. It complicated the absolute f*** out of my feelings. Especially when she said it would never happen again. Then she stopped communicating. Just became what it was before. Just talking about our son, not much else.

Hard lesson learned. Just because the opportunity presented itself, don't sleep with your ex. Especially if you still have strong feelings. Especially if you know they don't feel the same.

I doubt I'll ever truly get over her, I'll move on but I'll never forget.
It's the way we clicked, that'll never escape me. I loved her so much when we were together.

NEVER
Sleep with your ex.
No matter how many years have passed.
Don't make my mistake gentlemen.
Ladies too. Spare yourself the emotional rollercoaster.

That is such a good question but i don't know

I have really hard time to get over my ex. We dated only 8 months. She meets all the qualities of a wife that I looking for. I never wanted to settle down until I met her. I was like ok this is it, but because of lust God separated us. It has been almost a year now. The pain still felt so fresh.

There's a girl from hs. My sophomore year to 20. I'm 36 now. I try to remember what she did but still.

13 yrs ago I hooked up with a guy I didn't know very long, the condom broke and I ended up pregnant, I want to abort but he begged me not to, saying his dad wasn't in his life and he would never leave his kid. I kept the baby and tried to build a relationship with him, it was horrible, I was miserable he didn't help at all was just there physically,but stuck n there for the child, we had a second child 3 yrs later his mom told him 2nd isn't his so he left when she was about 3 month. DNA prove she is his. I was severely depressed when he left I still consider it my rock bottom. He moved on had another child I moved on had another child with a guy I'm very optimistic about, I'm holding back because I don't want to be hurt again but he's breaking down those walls. The thought of my ex still really hurt because he doesn't help with his kids that he begged me to have, no matter what I do beg him ,leave him alone, get the kids to ask, he still refuses. I'm happy I'm in a better relationship now. Last night I had a dream about the ex I told him I hate him he said I live you 2 and kissed me. And I was so happy. Today he's been on my mind all day, I'm confused I was happy our relationship ended he hasn't help since which would make me never consider getting back with him, and I never felt as if I loved him I was just trying to make the best of a bad situation. So why can't I let go? It's hurts that he doesn't help I don't understand why I'm not that crazy baby mama drama I give him his space and only ask for what the kids need. So why does he have so much power over me? And how do I get it back?

the only way i felt better was to trash everything she ever bought me had a big fire pit in my garden burnt it all and finally let go. i tried returning the most expensive things and her belongings but she didn't want to know even after 2 years had passed so i burnt it all and got my closer started fresh and finally got back my confidence to meet someone else. the only way your going to be happy again is to just let go meet other people and learn from your passed mistakes dont let it burden you because whats done is done whatever was said and how badly it ended is in the past and has happened its nothing you can do about it but to learn from it and let it make you be a better person not let it control your happiness just let it all go.

My brain knows that ship has sailed, but I miss my ex.
We were sadly stuck in a toxic loop of lows (we fight) and extreme highs (we make up).
We were putting energy in our relationship, but not in the same way. Misunderstanding each other.
Before we broke up, in our arguments she would question my love.
The pain I still feel today, over a year later, tells me two things: either she didn't understand me, or her words were meant to get a reaction, in hope of reassurance.
I think the later.

I don’t want to fully lose her..
I can’t feel anything. Feels so numb. I only feel something when I think about about her.
But I don’t want to ruin her life just because I want her..
I love her so much still..
I couldn’t make her happy.
I hope she’s happy now.

I wish it was me who’s making her happy now.

I was married for 23 yrs, we separated in July of '23 and our divorce was final on Halloween of the same year. We divorced as friends, she was my best friend. We were more intimate after separating and divorce than we were married. We were better together. She moved seven states away in January and within a couple of months, she had a boyfriend and is living with him. I'm still in love. I tried to get over her at first in an unhealthy way and then healthy way. Neither way has worked. There was bad in our relationship, but there was so much good too. We had some incompatibilities that ultimately brought her decision to divorce me. Love was there, but she said love wasn't enough. All I have left is love. I miss my love, my best friend. She cut contact with me in February in order to heal, but that's also when she moved in with her new guy. I don't know how to move on from this, I don't know if I can. I don't want anyone else . Is this a delusion I'm having? Am I healing? Is this part of healing? I was with her since I was 22, I had one relationship before her, so I have no idea. How do I not miss her? I just want my love and friend back. I'm so lost.

I am Stuck in this Timelime, Because I have known her all of my life. Its been 6 yrs since the last time we talked,but since then,She has gotten married about a year ago. I see her in my dreams,but she wont talk to me. Her family are my friends on social media,including her sister and her mother.I still have her photos saved on my phone. And Our videos of us having fun that I am having a hard time deleting.Which makes it hard for me to move on because I refuse to let go.Not easy. But I miss Miss her so much. She was my everything.Maybe Ill see her in a Different life 😢

my ey left 5 years ago... i basically thought im over here lol but lately i have very vivid weird dreams about her but no good dreams LOL

I miss my ex so much and quite frankly idk if i’ll ever be in love like that again. It pains me everytime I think about it. I try with someone new and I still hurt inside i really don’t what it is, i gotta be single until i figure it out cuz it pains me and the worst part she looks so happy without me.

Lately I dreamed about my ex for 3 consecutive days. And there's no month that I didn't dream about him. I still think about him after we broke up 9 years ago, it's a nightmare. Wish I could erase him in my memories.

I'll never get over the damn harlot...
I'll never love again either.
Me trusting love fucked my trust forever, to anyone.

Just remember SHES AN EX for a reason… chances R REALLY GOOD that she’s had “the new supply” already set up… when she was ready to leave she was probably really derogatory toward ya but most of all WHEN SHE KNOWS you’ve figured her out /unmasked her… then she’ll leave… the NEW SUPPLY might be great for awhile but eventually THE NARCISSIST SHE REALLY IS WILL SHOW UP AGAIN… just a matter if the new supply wants to or cares to put up with it… RESPECT YOURSELF ENOUGH TO MOVE ON Take care of yourself God Bless 🙏😇

I just want her and to move towards the future. I know my relationship wasn’t perfect but it was perfect to me. We split due to a list of factors including but not limited to miscommunication. I’d give everything just to lay my head in her lap one last time

My issue is we never broke up. We drifted apart. After 27 yrs he still jokes and says, "Well we never broke up so technically we are still together; but apart"

I just found out my ex who is now married and just gave birth to twins. I was such a fool when we were together. I told her I never wanted kids but I was just too young and didn’t understand life. I just don’t get why I still care? It’s been several years and I still think of them so much. I wish to move on but it’s hard to replace someone who was so special to me. What’s helped you guys in your journey with moving on?

i think ab her everyday,,, dream of her everynight...

I cant get over her..its been a year..she moved in a different city with someone else..i think about her everyday...even tough my sex life is good, i have good game with girls..still..i get bored of all of them and can't get in a relationship because i can't fall in love anymore..i just wanted her..

Depressing

I have an ex, he was nice at first, that's why I noticed something about him, every time he drinks alcohol, he loses himself, he is always angry and always slashes his wrist. I realized that he was affected by his family problem. We also broke up because I was already traumatized by him because he was hurting me. Year 2014 I heard that he died of a heart attack imagine he died without even apologizing to those he hurt and it was even more terrifying because he was full of anger in his heart. to be honest, our relationship is very creepy, I don't remember much that we had a happy moment because he is always angry, I think he has a mental health like Psychotic. it's just sad that after 10 years I just realized that I miss him I want to see him but he's dead. I can't sleep every night because I think about him, I miss him so much. maybe if he had listened to me until now his life would have been fine now. Goodbye Arkie 😣😢💔💐🕯️

I have several exes. But the only one that still haunts me is one from a couple of years ago. She was my everything and she suddenly just wasn’t. I haven’t been able to love or trust anyone I’ve been with since, not like I did with her. It’s like the pain that her leaving instilled within me means more to me than any modicum of affection I’ve experienced after.

incredible

8 months in a break up. Had 0 warning or closure. We were together for over 5 years. The sickness of playing back all of our memories together rots my mind. Now all I can think about is that other man filling her holes and bringing more joy to her life. Just stuck in a loop of depression and anxiety. Throwing money away and drinking everyday. What a hot mess

I'm into a marriage with My best friend 5 years. And I still think about her often...I still dream about her. It kills me I feel like I'm betraying my wife

well… I actually don’t. other than in noticing a cloud approaching, blown away or dissolving. if only I had known what I know now.

I sometimes think god is playing a joke on me because of how much I think about her 😂 that girl taught me was i won’t be falling in love again for a long time & thank god for that. I hope she is living a wonderful life

Ive thought the reason i cant get over my bm is after a decade. Its due to how can you like someone not your kids dad more than anyone else. I'm sorry. No ones gonna love my kid like i do. Or show love to her like i would. . . Am i fucking crazy?. Truly. I love her . Shes aging and i think shes more beautiful than ever. And i always have. ... ive tried with others nd i cant get near a point where I'm willijg to introduce them to my kid. . She cheated so i think thats my like hurt. Where ibcant get over her. But idk?..

Honestly, I think about how my relationships affected me negatively, since I got into those relationships, to cope with life back then. I am now realizing, that people have held my emotions back and told constantly that I’m too sensitive, and emotional, and I do feel very strongly. However, I also need to embrace that side of me that is sensitive, and in touch with myself because I feel more at peace honestly when I am able to feel my emotions around others, even if they don’t appreciate it or like it.

When you love someone you love them forever

complete strangers now. have no idea what shes doing, who shes with, where she is. its a surreal feeling honestly. still healing and its coming up on 6 months.

Your take is spot on. I've been trying to understand why exactly i keep replaying these feel good scenarios of my ex and I. And it made sense, bc IK I've truly let go and I'm fine with our separation but somehow I subconsciously refuse to relive the breakup and i end up thinking about all the good times. But it just makes it worse for me lol, i end up getting frustrated at myself but now I totally get it.

I split with my ex in 2021 and it still hurts i still miss her. I keep thinking it will go away but it doesnt. And what makes it worse is it was all my fault and i just cant forgive myself. I dont think ill ever settle down again. 😔

The only time I think about exes is when I’m going through a dry spell. It’s related to scarcity. Similarly, the only time I think about water is when I’m thirsty. When there is no water available, i think about the last time a had a cold refreshing beverage but In actuality, when I was drinking said beverage, it wasn’t anything to write home about.