honest convo about marrying young

I'm almost 25 and no marriage prospects. Most people in my immediate and extended family were married by my age. So there's some pressure for me to marry young.

I have no problem with marrying young, but in my case I'm just waiting for the right person, and I refuse to brute force a relationship.

Women can marry young but I don’t l think men should get married young until he has his resources and finances together.

All of the people who are getting married in their early 20s at my church have: a couple of kids they gotta raise and work for, with their youth totally wasted, or are already bored of their marriage in their late 20s - early 30s.

I don't see the point in being young, just fresh out of your teenage years, having "duties" as a son, and not having autonomy, to then jump into the marriage and kids bandwagon, and then being in the same controlling system called "family" for at least another 18 years.

I got married at 31, wife at 27. Sounds great to get married older, but older adults have their own life going and there is strife in who has to give up what for the relationship. Second, when your kids are teenagers, you’re too old for their crap.

For me the issue isn't as much marrying young as it is marrying early. I feel like too many people that marry young also marry/get engaged less than 6 months after meeting. I personally think that you need to have dated for someone for at least 6 months, then move in together and live together for at least 6 months, and then think about getting engaged. You learn a lot about each other from living together and bearing responsibilities together as a household. I know most religions restrict living together, so I can see this as being easier said that done. I'm really grateful that I knew my partner for 2.5 years, then dated for 3 years (of which 2 years we were living together) and then married. We took on more responsibilities gradually and grew together as a result.

25, not getting married til 30, I’m good. I’m getting my skydive license, see new national parks and hike new mtns first at my impatient pace before I figure myself out fully and feel ready to settle down. Easier to take care of myself.

If you can afford it, go for it. Same deal with kids

I often hear in the online space alot of negativity around marriage in general but also more specifically the more christian views like not living together before getting married, remaining a virgin etc. And on paper id agree with those views it does sound like a recipe for disaster but when i turn off the phone and take a look around me the opposite is true. Pretty much all the people in my life are Christians and alot of my friends got married at 19 or 20 and ive never seen them happier. Some are newlyweds and some have been married for 10 years.

Got married at 18, don’t do it

Men should not marry young because he most likely doesn’t make enough money and doesn’t have enough life and sexual experience. Mens sexual marketplace value peaks around 28 - 32 depending on the person and for women is 18 - 22.

I'm married at 19 to my wife who is also 19. Best decision in our lives. By God's design and grace I am able to be the sole income of our household at such a young age despite our culture. So many people were against this decision of ours but what I noticed is that all of them either had a bad marriage of their own, or never took the time or effort to understand us. Those who knew us were all for it and excited for us. And now that it's been 6 months I couldn't imagine any of this time without the most Beautiful Woman on Earth. Of course I'm biased she's my Bride. I am blessed by our High King to have her with me. Thank you Lord for this blessing and may you grant us a long and fruitful marriage making your name known each and every day.

thank you for this video...been having the similar problems you mentioned,,,but thank you for the encouragement,,,

I married at 26 and my wife was 21. We have been together for over 26 years. I really don’t see marriage at a younger age to be an issue. I recommend it.

I was dirt poor both in college. Why wait? I am 60 yrs old and I still want more in savings. If you wait until you are financially ready you will be dead when you are financially ready.

I got married at 25 after 4 years of courtship. I delayed marriage for 4 years due to fear and I felt I'd be judged by family for getting married early. I totally wish I had married my husband sooner. I have grown so much and life certainly began after marriage for me. I have now been married 8 years and we have 4 beautiful children. I truly am enjoying marriage and look forward to spending all my days on earth with him 🎉 ❤

Biblical masculinity and Biblical feminism. I want to be a 1 timothy man and i want a proverbs 31 woman . Burn that in your spirit .

24 years old is still super young!! the brain doesn't even finish developing until you're 25. Anyone who marries below 25 is literally marrying still as an adolescent

What are your thoughts on Mennonites and Anabaptists in general?

Jeremiah 1.

Being single in the later years is fine thing is are you comfortable with your life . Im 35 single never had a girlfriend not looking for one no rush i just flow .

Got married young, split up 6 years later, some more complicated relationships, found back to Christ and now I don't see anymore why men desire to get married at all.
Women are not what we expect and will try to influence you and control you (1. Moses 3,16).
Who marries acts well but who doesn't acts better!

The definition of fun is very subjective. As a Christian Gen Z, I really don’t fit in with a lot of my peers because I don’t think of fun as getting high and having mindless sex.

By the time I had met my wife, I was 27. I had been to more than five countries, three Olympic Games as a spectator and had been to most states in the US. I spoke two languages and was working on a third. I would have never been able to do that when I was 18 or 21 years old. As a matter of fact, there was no way I was mature enough at 18 to 21 get married. It depends on the person.

One of the stupidest things I've ever heard is "people grow apart".

Bullshit. I am the same person that I was at 16. I have known many people that have aged 20-30 years, and they have changed very little in their personality. Now some people change a lot, but that has more to do with their maturity. I was already a mature-minded person practically from birth, some people take longer.
Really, this whole idea marriage can't survive people "growing apart' is secular crap. If you don't spend any time together, yeah you can grow apart which is why it's important to not neglect each other even after kids! And " growing up heart" not a legitimate reason to get divorced anyway.
The second dumbest thing I've ever heard is people saying you need to have fun and experience other people. That's the sluts argument trying to legitimize whoredom as beneficial when there's actually nothing beneficial about it. Everybody I know of who slept around before marriage regretted it, or it played into their divorce.

Me and my wife dated for 3 months, and we got married. I was 17 and she was 16. We are still married and going onto our 32nd anniversary. When we got married we have $0 to our name. We were100% dedicated to our marriage, and that's all we knew. We worked hard and put ourselves thru college with $0 debt all while raising 2 kids. Since we were so young then we had so much to experience together and we grew closer together as time passes. We go everywhere and do everything together. We complete each other's sentences. I like was she likes and she likes what I like. 90% of our interests are exactly the same. Not sure how easy it is to find somebody with that level of compatibility at 30's and 40's, what are the odds at that age? Now our kids are fully grown and we are still relatively young in our late 40's (enjoying all the free time we have with each other) while many other couples now-a-day are just starting out with their marriage. For us, we wouldn't change anything.

I think marrying young is better because people havent been burned by life. If they marry the person that took their virginity, they dont have a comparison. Also, they are not in heartbreak because they married the first person they fell in love with. And can they do God's will together, build wealth quicker together, build and be more stable over all by working together in their marriage. Sleeping around for years, having numerous failed relationships, out of wedlock kids, child support, children by different people. Then trying to marry later on life once they have all this heartbreak baggage and a negative viewpoint life and relationships. Plus..they been through years of selfishness that makes it harder to marry later when a person has a harden mindset when selflessness is needed to make a marriage work. God instituted marriage. All the sin people engage in in their younger years often can be some of the very things that makes them less desirable as a marriage partner as they age. Proverb 5:18 Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth.

I think you should marry very young if it works great. I did at 18 with my first love we divorced. I lived and married again at 30 after being together 4 yrs. That ended. My second marriage lasted a long time but as we change and one person pulls away and falls in love during an affair there’s not much a wife can do. She’s stale the mistress is new and exciting. So just be prepared for any thing.

We were 21 and 23 and we grew together. 40 years in march and we are still happy.

21, Getting married next year. Why wait long if that person is the one?

Nick Freitas is a great content creator. Perfect crossover. I got married at 23 and the adventure defo did not stop. The travel and concert/festival experiences we've shared are amazing (some firsts for both of us).

But the real adventure is the growth you go through by being married. When I was single, I could mask the issues I had. But being married, those issues affected my wife. This was my motivation to get stuff in order. Same for her. Not sure I would have made the steps I have as a single man.

Turning 30 this year. I've never experienced reciprocal romantic affection that lasted more than a week or two, and in that case, she effectively ghosted me when her ex said he was willing to consider becoming a Christian.

I've wanted to be in a relationship with an eye towards marriage for almost 25 years.

I wish I could have married young and grown together. I still want someone who will help me with building a life, even though there isn't much left I need assistance with. I don't really want a "trophy" wife, where you do all the work and are "rewarded" with her presence at the finish line. I want a companion for life.

Year by year, I feel I'm breaking down. I don't see the pattern of how God decides to give some men godly wives while others suffer alone. I don't understand how my growing and unwilling isolation is glorifying to Him, nor what I can do to correct it. Yes, I've grown so close to Him and understand so much about Him and His Word, but I don't feel taken seriously when I try to share my learnings, like I just have too much time on my hands to study this "theology stuff" and am not really trustworthy to teach anyone more than kids or new converts - which, to be fair, they need to hear from God, too, but there's so much I want to discuss and share that is just beyond the average Chrostian around me - it compounds the feeling of being alone.

I'm frustrated. I feel neglected. Cognitively, I know and believe God has a plan, I just wish I understood it better, had a timeline of what He wants me to be doing specifically and practically. Even if it's just something as simple as she isn't ready yet, having an idea of how long to wait would be so nice.

I'm finding it interesting that the half dozen or so videos that I have watched on "why to get married young" are by men, from a male perspective. Getting married young can be good for men because it is an impetus to be responsible, grow up and put the video games aside. Women getting married too young can be permanently infantalized. It's like giving a crutch to a baby who is just learning how to walk. She will never learn how to "stand on her own two feet." She can lose (or never find) her own identity because when the two become one flesh, the flesh they become is the man's. She takes his last name etc.

Hey I'm 16 and I've been dating the girl I've been planning to marry for 3 years. I'm hoping to propose to her as soon as I know I can financially support us both. I might sound like I'm rushing into things but God was good to me by putting her into my life and we've been dating for three years. In around two we'll both be eighteen and be technically able to marry, but We probably won't until I'm able to work a lot more and pay for things like a ring and a car and somewhere to live, things like that. I think that if God has you on the path to live your life with someone I don't see why you would not want to marry, no matter how young you are. I know God has her in my life as part of his plan and I can't wait to start my life with her. Sure part of it is sexual, since I promised God I wouldn't participate in physical intimacy before I get married, and she did the same. Also as a teenager in this generation there are so many temptations and so many things that make you feel like people out of God's will have a more sexually fulfilled than I am, so part of it is I want to be able to have sex according to God's plan but it's just a small part. But part of it is I can't wait to live together and be able to see her every day. Wake up every morning to see her and tell her good morning, maybe make breakfast for us, maybe start a Christian family together. The point is I can't wait to marry her, and as long as it's God's plan I don't see much reason to wait.

I see these videos where these guys for some reason are hawking that you should get married young. I disagree. At 20, two years ago you were sitting at a desk in high school. There is a reason actuary tables change for insurance companies at age 25: because the brain is still growing including your judgement centers. Wait a bit. See who you are as a person. When you are still growing and figuring out who you are you do not need another person in the mix, quite possibly with thier emotional centers not quite on par as of yet. 48 percent of those who marry before the age of 18 are likely to divorce within 10 years, compared to 25 percent of those who marry after the age of 25. 44. 60 percent of couples married between the age of 20 -25 will end in divorce. Grow, wait, and know who you are first before you jump into something that takes a lot of effort and energy. The comments below me where they married at age 21? They are just kids. Good luck.

Yah like why would you pass up the one to date other ppl???! I wish I met the one already like all this dating sucks

thanks for your videos. they're AWESOME and so EYE-OPENING!!! seriously, thanks a lot! your channel is more than necessary, it's essential!

I’m 22 & am still single and have a desire for marriage I’m not ready for it & im aware of that so I’m getting myself ready for it and I’m probably in a good place since I’m content with being single so I’ll be content in a relationship as well

Married at 21 and her 20 and still married since 2007. Marriage takes effort, maturing and communication. Of course Love is a main reason we are still married.

I think there's lots of biological support for marrying young (declining fertility rates in females post 25, you're generally not more attractive older, etc....). Of course for some people maybe its better to wait and marry when you are older but I don't think its good for a society if everyone goes that path.

beautiful also dont let ur trauma of maybe your parents marriage that didnt go so well prevent you from one of the greatest blessings you could have get counselling, therapy, heal so you can love someone the way God would want you too (:

A lot of well meaning Christians have made marriage the "end of the journey" in a different way. "Be pure and holy. Love Jesus harder and feel more contentment and delight during your brief single season. When the time is right and you are good enough and spiritually ready God will drop the perfect spouse into your lap. A love worth waiting for and your ultimate reward. Muh Great Aunt Agatha didn't marry till she was eighty but her marriage was perfect and her husband was perfect and worth waiting for and God's reward for every Christian life."
Great Aunt Agatha's happiness would be Heaven. Not late life marriage. If she had died unwed and gone to Heaven it would have been worth the wait. Being with Jesus is the end game. Not marrying some "perfect spouse in God's perfect time." Nothing is perfect in this fallen world. Christians need to quit confusing marriage and eternity.

My view has changed on this. Get married young because it gets exponentially harder to find anyone when you’re older. The money will work itself out.

Marriage (at any age) is not necessary for all people. For many, marriage serves as a facilitator of lessons. But for some, marriage can actually hinder lessons of the soul (that may require extensive time alone to grasp). It is important that we each tune into God’s highest plan for our lives. Furthermore, we should never fool ourselves into thinking that one path is more evolved than another. Comparisons are not meaningful in this domain. Good luck to all❤

What about a job? Shouldn't you be employed before getting married?

I'm from a background of disadvantage. So, for me, marriage was not my priority - I struggled for everything and didn't want to be a burden but an asset to my husband. So the delay was to become a better and more valuable person.

I'm currently 31 and have never been in a relationship recently became a Christian and always wanted to get married but never fully engaged into it

This is beautiful 👏🏾

I’m not quite there yet, I’m 19, and I am anxious to be in a relationship, but at the same time I know that the Lord is good and I’m trusting that the one will come, just have to be patient.