You're Not Lazy: How to Live a Chaotically Organised Life

Thank you so much for being so helpful. You are beautiful in every way

Can I ask what you are using for your thumbnails and videos? So beautiful and engaging.

wow it is true !!!

....... You're amazing. Thank you so much.

This makes more sense to me, even though it's disappointing to learn that I can't just have a visible schedule. Learning vocabulary every day for a week was always boring to me, however learning vocabulary for 1-2 hours on a single day was motivating. It didn't even have to be because of a test it could just be homework and I would get the same motivation. It's not just pressure, but a bit of pressure helps cause it means I get into contact with the study material more intensely which I adore. Let me master the vocab unit to perfection, let me order the words in different ways. But don't set a timer for 5 minutes and just ask me flashcards. I hate intangible information when I can't grasp it and focus on it and think about it. I need to have it written down and to have time with the info.I hope the other areas in life which don't work that way AKA cleaning will work out regardless

But how you can fixes those things that you learn in your brain? Or you don’t need this?

As someone who is autistic but doesn’t have ADHD, I have found this type of work style helpful when I am in (or teetering on the edge of) burnout. I tend to go all-in on the hyperfocus, but when I am burned out, doing that one day when I’m struggling to regulate and will absolutely not remember to pace myself or take breaks can push me into needing three total rest days afterward. The behavior she describes with “priming” helps me stay connected to my work when I’m having a rest day and feeling unhappy that I can’t do the marathon of work that I would rather be doing.

This sounds like being a Sim. Oh my god I'm a Sim

This method feels so much better ! I think I am a lot like this to .

I love this video, I have literally set a reminder on my Google calendar to rewatch this twice a year since August 2022. It's a nice reminder that progress doesn't look the same way for everyone and those "fall behind" periods don't mean you're failing, you can always catch up and even get ahead ❤

What resource did you use to learn 3-D animation? Just curious.

I definitely struggle with this, but unlike many of the people here I don't think I have ADHD... even though some people think I do. Stimulants never helped me. I require immersion and I have to work at a certain pace to maintain inertia... but I'm not a super-producer, and I read quite slowly. I'm not even sure what my talent is other than the nebulous skills of 'figuring things out' and 'putting things together' in novel ways. I also have only the vaguest idea of what my process is, and in school I was always most successful when I more or less ignored my classes and just did my own thing. More and more, I can't even tell when I'm doing something and when I'm not because to most people it looks like procrastination, but if they question me on it, I have 6 reasons for everything even if I don't know myself what the outcome will be, or is even supposed to be.... but on the other hand I also know that if I have expectations of the outcome, then either I am setting myself up for dissapointment if I'm wrong, or boredom if I'm right because there is no room for it to be anything other than what I thought at the outset. I can't work like that... but I have a hard time calling what I do 'work' and an even harder time expecting anyone to pay me for it. However, time and again, with every project I undertake I find myself doing something similar even if I try not to. I have my diagnoses so I know what my disorders are, but I still don't know if this behavior is part of a disorder or not. 😅 At times it can be shockingly effective, but other times..... not so much. I've also found that there are so many things I end up doing really intensively for a while, and then I might abruptly stop and never do it again. My relationships are like that as well. A day will come after which I'll never see or talk to that person again, and not because I try to avoid them. I'm trying to learn to trust in the process and embrace small failures so I can avoid catastrophic ones, but it's been really hard, and when I try to get help it feels like people are fucking with me. In my case I've discovered that I am way too susceptible to the dynamics of other people, so it's what I'm working on now, but that's not entirely straightforward either.

I liked David Allen's GTD system when I encountered it, and he is the only productivity guru I've come across who advocates doing as little as possible. 😂 The core principles are "delegate, defer, delete" and only after that, "do". The idea is that you become more effective if you can focus on what really matters and that most things don't need to be done by you, or right now... or even at all. After that what remains are tasks that are so trivial they will take less than 2 minutes and can be finished in less time than it takes to think about them so you don't even enter them into your system, and then after that there are the things you were born to do. The only things you put on a calendar are the things there is actually no point in doing after that date, and the rest are organized by a set of periodically revited priorities..... The problem I ran into with this system (or any system) was even though it was relatively simple and made a lot of sense, I discovered that unless your mind is already of a certain order, there is nothing you can do to get any system of organization to work. At the time I was super stressed, sleep deprived, and depressed, so I would either forget my notebook at home, not have my phone with me or the battery would die, or I would lose my password for the app I was trying to use, or I might forget to enter items. David Allen talks about how your system has to be constantly available and you have to be able to trust it in order for it to work.... later, to my chagrin, I discovered (again) that if your mind is already of a certain order, you don't need a system to organize your work!

One of the things that makes self help culture kind of toxic is people end up misattributing their success to things that are incidental. Apparently Nietsche talks about this; longevity might not be a result of a low calorie diet, but a low metabolism, and a low calorie diet is also a result of a low metabolism. Super organized people don't stay on top of things because of their schedules... they are already on top of things, and like making lists and schedules because they like organization. The research on confabulation backs this up. We don't do things for the reasons we state.... we make up reasons after the fact to explain what we do. Jean Piaget said that "wherever there is a structure, we find a value" not because we form institutions to support our values, but that we come up with values to justify our institutions. In so many cases, the popular "solution" ends up being for a problem that no one ever had. I've found deconstructing chiche's a really helpful exercise in identifying these "solutions" and diagnosing what might be wrong with them.

You explain this method beautifully.

i have a lot of interests, but I could never really focus on expanding any of them and I jut thought it was because I wasn't interested enough

This is so....me.Thank you so much...❤I always thought I am a weirdo. But you showed me I am not. Thank you so much...These videos means a lot to me.🫶🙏

Tell me you have ADHD without saying it

me awake at 3am

I hate my brain so much, thank you for making me feel hope

This is the first productivity video that I relate to

just want to say i watched this video 2 years ago and it has hugely helped me in accepting my differences and struggles in terms of work & productivity. i am so much more inclined to lean into how i naturally want to work/live/exist in this world rather than try to force myself to fit an arbitrary standard of "normal" if there is no real reason to force it. its been such a powerful mindset shift and i just want to say thank you again for making this video.

You reminded me of Leonardo Da Vinci. He loved ambiguity and saw subtlety in the things of nature (Curiosity). He would often take breaks from his great works, taking time to pause, and as a result, the popes or his patrons would scold him, asking why he was taking such long breaks in the park or while walking. He would respond that idleness and pauses were also part of his work, and when he returned, he would see new perspectives to improve his work. He would approach it from different viewpoints—like a man, a child, a woman, or even imagining himself in the shoes of a little girl. When he viewed his paintings again, he would repaint them with these different perspectives and circumstances. At the end of his life, he apologized to his Creator, saying, 'God, forgive me for not reaching the perfection that You embody.' Marvelous.

I think I’m in love with you. You are brilliant. You get me!

You're literally amazing - this spoke to me so deeply, I'm implementing "Fall behind, Catch up, Go ahead" RIGHT NOW.

Very relatable! Thank you for this when I'm a chaotic organized person. Ive been priming my brain to try to get some stuff done by trying to learn to love doing stuff.

How do I subscribe as a patient

It's the problem with "rules" for life, isn't it? "Rules" are for most people, but there are always exceptions to the rules that apply for the majority. It doesn't mean that people will stop setting rules, because most people need to pay attention to them most of the time, but not everyone works according to rules. Stands to reason. We have an awareness that there are different types of neurodivergent people but that doesn't mean "the rules" don't still help and support the majority.

I liked the video 1/4 of the way through, and now that I'm 1/2 of the way through, I wish I could give it another like

Hmm 🤔 This makes a lot of sense to me.

Oh… oh my god this dinged my brain so loudly YOU EXPLAINED MY LIFE

Great explination, I love the part of accepting your chaos and using it to your advantage. Then not feeling bad about not doing what others are taught to do.

Honestly, thank you!! I also like James Clear The Atomic Habits, and it works for learning guitar but not for projects. Here's how it works for guitar:
1) I play guitar 1 hour a day, it's just so much fun that I actually do it almost every day.
2) I have so simple and clear time and place that I can do it: every day at 9 PM at home because my flatmate goes to bed at 10 PM.
3) I have my guitar on my table next to my desk so I can't forget as I see it all the time.
4) I always know what to practice, as I have made a playlist of songs I want to learn, as well as drills and theory to improve my learning,
5) and I track them in Notion, so that I can move from: not started, in progress, done. I also record my playing. -> fun and satisfying to know I am progressing, and it makes me want to play more.

However, I've always found it very difficult to work on projects regularly before a deadline. Optimizing for passion is a great mindset shift! I should just make sure I set a big deadline, and then allow myself to work on it once I have become interested in it. However, in a way this also follows James Clear's advice, if you consistently (or consistently enough, like once a week!) first watch videos to increase your interest. It's just level 1 work, so easy watching videos. However, where it could differ from James Clear, if you purposefully allow yourself to "wait while the soup is brewing" doing other things, and then come back with a more objective look on it.

BTW the way you changed James Clear's curve was one of the most badass things I've ever seen!!

finnalyyyy someoneee

too liberal. it implies that you should go with your feelings rather than facing the suffering head on, it makes you impulsive and multi-task. it makes you avoid situations that doesn't "suit your feelings" which is really a messed up philosophy

I gained many insights from this!

I can't believe I didn't apply journaling in my productive times to know how and why I got into it.

What I will do is to journal down things that are extremes: extreme up and extreme down.

What went right and what went wrong? What to keep and what to avoid?

Thank you!

finally someone who understands

I have been like this the whole time and always feel bad about myself. Luckily i found ur video that helps a lot

Thank you so much for your service to the ADHD community

As far as for habit formation. There are two books I actually found legit helpful.Tiny Habits by BJ fogg. Being the director of Stanford's behavioral science lab. He has both the book and online courses that help with specific needs. He has one course for adhd. It's been tested on 40,000 individuals supposedly. The other book is elastic habits by Steven guise. It's basically an easier and more practical atomic habits but with different levels of intensity and a tracking system that works really well. Hope these help a bit.

Finally, someone like me 😌🥺

Hello, fellow "Chaotic Passionate" person. 🤩 I often watch YT info videos at x 1.25 speed... but found myself watching this at x0.75 speed instead 😅

related so hard. this is huge for those struggling with adhd. i need to stop letting myself drown in frustration and get demotivated cuz this caused me to lose all passion and i became depressed. it's so so so important to understand your own habits and strengths and weaknesses and acknowledge them.

Wow I am just like you. I never considered it is OK to not be linear. Thank you.

This was such a helpful perspective! I’ve never thought about my chaos and deep work this way. Thanks!

It's possible you just changed my life, that was a striking realization. Thanks you so much!

Thought I was the only one who can't be consistent on tasks. The one tip that caught my eye is the Exposure-Motivation Curve, I do have times where I am scrolling on social media and I see a motivational video that motivates me to finish my tasks. Great video!

THANK YOU!!! After YEARS of being mad at myself, reading Atomic Habits as well, and always feeling like a failure, thank you so much for your relatability! Not only am I also wired different, but I also have a very unpredictable lifestyle due to the constant unpredictable games from my ex-husband, children involved. There’s no way my life will ever be consistent due to my personal situation. Thank you so much for giving me hope! You have taught me that I CAN work around my challenges, that not everyone works the same way, and to be gentle on myself.❤