Are YOU Codependent? 7 Common Signs of Codependency

You're the best, Katie. Thank you for being so genuine.

Thank you for this wonderful information and awareness...Do you have any videos or suggestions on how to process grief by death of spouse while having unaware/ untreated codependancy complicating the grief process?

Try not calling anyone for a year, then see who calls out to you. I have one friend who calls me on the regular, his family considers me family.

I stopped relationships all together, its too overwhelming.

❤❤❤😊😊😊❤❤❤

I have that. And I can assure you that ADHD topped with a few autism traits makes it all extra spicy and complicated 🫠

I always thought my mom was my best friend and the most self-sacrificing person I’d ever known. We were extremely close even into my early 30s. I began to discover a year ago that what was really going on was she was codependent with me. What followed that was intense self-disgust and a deep sense of violation. I got into therapy and as of right now I don’t have a relationship with her. The harm done to victims of codependency is no joke. It was emotional incest, and I’ve had to deal with the weight of that.

Amazing video.
Thank you very much for you great content.
You really help me a lot

Thank you for talking about this without shaming anyone who still needs others.
There’s something so quiet and painful about not knowing if your love feels like a burden. This video didn’t just inform — it softened something harsh inside.
Have you ever questioned whether needing someone made you “too much”? How did you learn the difference between care and dependency?

You have described me. I thought i was just an overthinking empath. I need help starting and following through. This video is beyond helpful!! Thank you so much.

"Great job on creating content that educates and uplifts at the same time!"

Thank you for giving voice to this. Such an important topic to understand.

One of my care team members called me out on bending over backwards to frame my communications with my mother so she wouldn’t get angry. I was trying to control her behavior. I needed to stop worrying about her anger and start structuring our interactions to keep myself as safe as possible. Best feedback I’ve ever gotten from a clinician, and I have gotten a lot of good feedback from clinicians.

I started setting boundaries. My mother violated boundary after boundary, until she finally violated herself right out of my life. Tant pis. It was wonderful to let go of 20+ years of guilt for being a bad daughter.

Friends, please check out my psychology clinic too. Thank you! ♥️

I didn’t even know I had this but it’s me to a frightening degree.

I recall doing a leadership course involving 360 feedback a few years ago. I was extremely hurt when I saw "co-dependent" come up as one of my strongest measures (view of others at work). At the time, I remember feeling like no-one truly new me, after all I'd never been able to trust anyone enough to call them a friend so how could I possibly be co-dependent. I now understand where this comes from (childhood trauma). Four years of therapy and I'm still overwhelmed at the enormity of the mental health challenges I face. I fear that my current psychologist may have given up on me after I tried put words to my "overwhelmed" - she didn't arrange a time for our next session (first time in our 25 sessions together). I've never connected with another therapist in anywhere close to the same way I connect with this one, I fear I'll never find another therapist that I can trust.

What if you feel like you're the one being codependent?

I'm weird with co-dependency. I know I'm co-dependent, but i don't let others know I'm codependent. The only one who knows is my therapist. Everyone else thinks that I'm just an easy going person. Which I am, to an extent. I'm just so worried about burdening others with my issues, so I always put others first. But not in an obvious way, if that makes any sense.

Ok so I just want to share something that hit me whilst watching (No spoilers!) "The Sacred Lies of Minnow Bly, The psychologist says to Minmow "You are not responsible for the decisions other people make, its out of your control" there is a weight to this that also comnects to a strong codependency pattern that is really hard for me to let go of.. because of knowing the risks & impact that can, has or may happen when other peoples decisions have harmful & bad consequences.. 😢

How about going through life knowing that a group of people purposely& intentionally negate you any means to recieve the healing mandatory to live as you know the value of your existing to you and all others.that constant giant breathing behind you waiting to disaster your life and any attempts to live as you yourself choose.knowing you are purposely always being their target to fail you at everything you attempt.not accidentally but purposely forced to live a fallacie.all at the witness of all present tense and for future generations .The United States Of America.

Hey Kati,
Thank you for sharing all your insights with us, your videos bring such great understanding and inclusion to all. I wondered if you could make one about Alexithymia? I’d love you to share your thoughts with us on understanding and feeling emotions.

Excellent baseline tests at the end there. I recognise codependency in others very easily and even help them find their way to a healthier place, but it didn’t even dawn on me that I was doing the same thing until a couple of years ago, age 36. I realised that I was exhaustively managing everyone else’s moods, not because they needed it, but because I did. I seems so obvious now 😂 this is a great video to “touch base” with when anyone needs a refresher or reminder.